The Fishie Bowl

So, since I have a freelance design due tomorrow that I haven't even started that involves a flash animation (that I already asked for an extension for) this would be a great time to write in my blog (procrastination).

 

I've been known to procrastinate but this is ridiculous...never like this. Why? I think I am officiallly BURNED OUT. I don't know if it's because I'm 7 months pregnant and not sleeping well or if it's because I've been working so hard on my stamp company the last few months or I'm just tired of doing orthodontic websites for this client of mine...who knows. The thing that sucks is we owe big time taxes this year so this is not the time for me to not want to work.

 

I told my freelance job I'm officially on maternity leave starting April 1st and I'm counting down the days. I really think I'll feel better if I just take a break from freelancing. And what I really want to do is work on my stamp design company....I need to get going on new designs before baby comes (because like I'll have time after that for the first few months...)

 

I'm laughing because the last set of photos I published to my blog was my scrapbooking retreat from last year and we're about to go on the retreat again next weekend. HA HA HA. :) That's a good indicator of how truely crazy my life has been the past year though. I like to be busy but not this busy. I'm really hoping my stamp company takes off so I can just focus on that and not have to do as much freelance.

 

Sidenote...we're about to run out of room in our house when baby arrives and we cannot afford to upgrade yet. Where are we going to put this baby? We're thinking our computer room is going to have to go...but then were do we put the computers?! (This is probably the most used room in our house...) I'm hoping Phillip gets a big fat promotion soon.

I just realized it's been 6 months since I've written in my blog...that's because it's been CRAZY! Meridith and I launched our stamp design company (www.lizzieannedesigns.com) and that is keeping us very busy. We are going to be in the CHA show in Anaheim at the end of the month and it's starting to freak me out...it's costing so much money to be in this show. I really hope it pays off. We have been getting a lot of interest though so far so I'm getting excited as well! We'll see how it goes...

 

Other things that have happened since then is I found out I was prego end of August! YEEEAHHHH! We went to Disneyland the day after I found out, and the last day or two of my trip, the SICKNESS arrived. It stayed until right before Thanksgiving. So that was also eating up a lot of time...I was barely well enough to do anything during that. So much sicker than I was with Ethan. But of course we are thrilled, AND we found out we're having a girl! Yippeee! Baby is due May 9th.

 

THEN the "weather" came. We've had record flooding, windstorms, and snow the past 3 months...it's like one natural disaster after another. Of course this has been happening all over Western Washington---not just us---but when it's bad, it's always worse in Duvall. Most residents in Duvall were without power for 8 days during the windstorm and we just got 7 inches of snow two days ago...CRAZY. Makes you wonder what's going on around here (well I think it's Global Warming. Check out the "Inconvienent Truth" documentary.) During the power outage we gave up and decided to drive to my parents house in Salt Lake. Of course we found out our power came back hours after we left. :) But we were still glad we went...we had a really good time. Not sure we'll ever make that drive in winter again (we'll fly next time) but it was nice to be with the family for Christmas.  Below is a photo of Ethan and Meridith's daughter, Olivia, at Temple Square. (Note they are holding hands...cute!)

 

So that's been the last few months in a nutshell. I'm looking forward to this show...both going to it and being DONE with it...so hopefully I can spend Feb, March, and April filling stamp orders and waiting for baby #2 to arrive.

I have so many friends who are having problems with child bearing, child rearing, and parenting right now it blows my mind. I have friends who badly want to be parents with no kids. I have friends who seem to be able to have kids but have horrible pregnancies and don't have as many children as they would like (I guess I could add myself to that category.) I have friends who have TOO MANY kids. I have a friend who cried to me today about finding out she was pregnant with her third girl...she was hoping for a boy as this was to be her last pregnancy. I have a friend who was knocked up and who will probably end up on welfare because she can't afford to raise a child (adoption..hello?!) And of course, I have friends who have children with disabilities and health issues...those are the most heartbreaking.

 

Why is the process of bringing these little souls down to this earth so dang hard and so complicated? (question for the day I get to heaven I guess...) 

 

The kid thing has got to be the single thing in life that brings the most joy and the most pain at the same time. Every friend I have who is dealing with these types of trials suffers greatly, and it's very sad. It doesn't really help to hear that others are going through it as well (and there are plenty of others) because it's just not something that you want to have happen to you. I think as kids, especially as girls...we assume that someday we'll just have the exact children we want, and that will be that and we hold on to that until the day we actually start having them. And it's crazy for us when things don't turn out the way we had planned---which is funny because when it comes to having children you pretty much have zero control over what your gonna get.

 

I feel very lucky to have my little boy, and I know I am lucky.

It has been so hot here...and, just like most washington homes, we do not have air conditioning. My friend pointed out how lame it was that washington homes don't have air conditioning as a standard because it does get hot enough for it. It's a good point. Maybe we don't have entire summers full of hot days like this but when we do it's just miserable. It's 85 degrees in my house and I haven't been able to sleep for three nights. I'm trying to freelance, but my computer is upstairs in the hottest room in the house and my hand is literaly slipping off the mouse.

 

Not to mention I am just not in the mood to freelance these days anyways...I am suffering from burn out. I am much more interested in designing stamps for my soon-to-be stamp company, and that's what I end up doing instead of freelance. The problem is the freelance is what pays for my stamps. So you'd think that would be a motivator (and it is, but not until the last minute. ;)

 

I'm also longing for my college friends these days...I just miss the days when there was a lot less crap going on in the world and so it was easier to be a friend to somebody. The older you get, the harder it is to compete for a friends attention....they just have too many other things going on. I know I'm guilty of doing that too and I need to make an effort to not do that to others.

My mother (or aunt?) recently sent me these photos of my grandma. The one of my grandma sleeping just cracked me up because it brought back so many memories...this is *exactly* how I remember her. She was able to sleep sitting up. I always thought that was so funny as a kid! The other photo is my grandma in her early twenties. She was such a lovely person. I hope that when I'm gone people remember me as fondly as I remember her. I wish I could talk to her now that I'm older too because I have a feeling we both had the same kind of outlook on life...it would have been fun to chat with her. She had an adventureous spirit, loved to travel, loved her kids, loved to work and go out to lunch and tea with friends, loved to paint and do artsy craftsy kinds of projects.... hmmm, sounds familiar! :)

I've always believed that one's girlfriends are as important (if not more important) than, well, men. :) Now, if you end up finding that one special man than by all means, that man should be numero uno. But I have to say that most girlfriends I have are devoted to that one man (husband) but in turn are devoted to a whole lot more girlfriends. And rightly so. That's because it takes a girl to really understand what a girl goes through I think. I might cry to my husband about things that are bothering me and I appreciate the feedback I get from him...from the "male" perspective. But I know it will most likely be my girlfriends that really understand!

 

Something I have been pondering lately is why it is I've lost touch with some old friends...this is very unlike me. I think it may be because I choose friends differently than I used to. I feel like I have such limited time now that the friends I do keep in touch with need to really live by the girlfriend code. The code being that Girlfriends are high-priority. (maybe not always top, but definately high.) I have some old friends who never really grasped this concept, and these are the friends I've ended up loosing touch with, not oddly enough. It's sad to me because I am not the type of person to ever loose touch with a friend...at least a friend who I have some history with.  But I guess I'm just at that point in my life where I need friendships to be effortless and meaningful. Luckily I have plenty of friends who fit that bill. Hopefully I fit the bill as a friend to them as well...it's so easy to get caught up in life and forget to be a good friend back. I really do appreciate my friends more than they know.

 

Speaking of girlfriends, I just returned from a scrapbooking retreat on Whidbey Island...it was lovely! The weather was so perfect...we got so lucky because May can be iffy. We rented this beautiful house overlooking the water. I got lots of scrapbooking done, and I also went wine-tasting for the first time...ha ha ha! :) It was fun. (a little wine aint gonna kill me.) Below is a photo of our scrapbooking group. This will definately become a yearly tradition!